21.2.10

Things that make me go mmmmmmm

So, Heather over at Notes from Lapland tagged me in the latest meme to hit the blogger scene (okay, I doubt it's the latest as there's a new one every 2 minutes, but you get my drift).

The idea is to write about ten things that make you happy and then tag your blogger friends to do the same. And you get the great honour of displaying this handy-dandy Happy 101 badge. My first ever badge! I'm thrilled! It makes me so . . . . happy!

Want to know what else makes me happy? Read on . . .

*UPDATE - I forgot to tag my blogging friends I'm passing this along to. So here goes,
My wants-to-remain-anonymous friend Entropy Girl
Tara at Mushy Peas
and
Andreae at With the Crickets


The ten things that make me happy. Or ridiculously mirthful at least are:

Drum roll please

1. In the category of ridiculously mirthful: fart/shart humour
I hadn't heard of the phenomenon known as a "shart" until I watched the movie "Along Came Polly." I was hugely pregnant with H at the time and literally fell off the couch laughing. My lovely husband kept rewinding and repeating the scene until I literally peed my pants. Now that's happiness there!



2. In the same category and an appropriate second place: ass humour
I am a child. Really. I crack up when my kids say the word "butt" or anything else related to that region. I get a huge kick out of one of H's books about a construction site that says a cement mixer has to turn to "keep his load soft" before he "dumps it." The best humour I've read along these lines is this lovely email my husband sent me on a really, extraordinarily bad day (that would be the day my crib fell apart, our tire went flat and James Delorey died). I asked him if he could cheer me up; he did:
The tire work is fine, it's been done.

The only problem is that once I arrived at the tire place, on the way in I slipped and fell on my ass. It really hurt, and I got dirty. When I got inside, the technician said first thing "Hi, your ass is dirty. Did you fall on your ass?"
I said "Yes, I fell on my ass. Thank-you for asking."
"That's ok," he said. "You've got such a nice ass, I hate to see you dirty it up."
So I decided to wander around the store for a bit, thought I'd look for some pants. I found a nice pair of black corduroy pants, and took them over to the change room. I asked the lady to let me in, and she did. I came out to have a look in the mirror, and there she was standing outside.
"Those pants look nice," she said.
"Oh," I said. "Thanks."
"They fit your ass really well."
"You think so?" I asked.
"Oh, yes," she said. "I've seen a lot of asses come out of there today, and yours is definitely the best."
"Gee," I said -- "thanks a lot."
"No problem," she said. "Truth be told, it's way nicer than my husband's."
"Wow," I said, "that really is a compliment."
"Plus, he farts a lot," she said.
"Really, that's a bummer," I said, trying to sound consoling. "That must be rough."
"It is," she said, "I'm thinking of moving."
"Well, I better blow," I said, promptly regretting my choice of words.
I got back to the auto centre, and the car was ready.
The technician was just getting off the phone. "Asshole," he said to me.
"Excuse me?"
"Excuuusemee," he mimicked. "My wife says your ass is nicer than mine. The fuck you tryna prove?"
"I'm sorry," I said. "I can't help my ass."
"Get going," he said. "Move your ass." He threw my keys at me.
I started for the door.
"Well, he said, "it is kinda cute."

Isn't he a loving husband to take time out of his day to write me such a lovely story?

3. Okay, last one in the ridiculous mirth category: inserting innapropriate lyrics into popular songs.
No, I'm not talking about "the ants are my friends, they're blowing in the wind." I'm talking about the lyrics I invent in order to say what I think the lyricist really meant. Recognise this song:
F*** me out on the gravel driveway
Nightly beside my parent's honda
Push, push, push it deep inside me
You bring your boots and I will bring my mat.
There's more, but I'll spare you. Don't have it yet? It is, of course, Sixpence None the Richer's "Kiss Me."




Moving on to those things that make me sublimely content:

4. Making up my own silly songs.
No, not like the one above. Just silly little ditties I sing throughout the day. Sometimes they help me remember things - like the one I sing when using my credit card: "What's my pin? What's my pin? Which brain cell did I store it in? I think that's right. It better be right. I think I've got it now." (sort of to the tune of Frere Jacques). Or there's the ones I sing to celebrate: when we bought our first house with almost a half acre of land and I looked so forward to our vegetable garden and being able to compost "gonna collect up all my peelins and huuuuuuurt my neighbours feelins." Or there are the little ones I make up to comfort or entertain the children : "Hey-ho little fish don't cry" or "It's okay baby Blue Jay." These songs are even more fun because I can't hold a note to save my life.

5. Making something: food, craft, those little humans that pop out of my nether regions every couple of years.
I've been making lots of things lately, but I'm most pleased with the things I make with and for my children. Like this special sign I made for H's teacher for 100 days of school. They were asked to bring in a collection of 100 somethings to celebrate the day. So we used 100 handstitched lines to spell out Mrs. Hodder's Kindergarten Class
It felt extra special to make this with him because I felt it was an opportunity to show him that we don't have to be consumerist collectors; we can actually make things of our own. And it also gave him really good practice in the form of letters, he stiched the "Kindergarten" all by himself (with a little guidance)

6. All those unexpected "gifts from the world" we get.
Like the first five Susie, over at New Day New Lesson mentions in her post. Perhaps it's a bit of a cheat to take her five and make it one, but there's a lot of things that make me happy so I have to condense into broad categories!

7. Learning something new.
I'm not talking about those daily lessons, like Susie talks about in her blog. I'm talking about cold, hard facts. There's a bit of a statistician in me, must be the Capricorn coming out. I just love finding out things, discovering new facts, happening upon unexpected knowledge. Like did you know there are more people killed by falling coconuts each year than are killed by sharks? Or that almost as many women kill their husbands as men kill their wives? Or that there's such a thing as Lego Porn?

8. The perfect quote, opening line, or lyric.
Quotes from Wayne Dyer make perfect sense; the first line in Tolstoy's "Anna Karenina" is utmostly repeatable; the lyrics to Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds' "God is in the House" are eerily accurate. These are all things that make me smile in the shower.

And the final category: those things that make me "heart happy" or just put joy in my life.

9. The Law of Karma
Such as explained here. In physics, the idea that each action results in an equal and opposite reaction. As another part of this, in Christianity The Golden Rule. Or in any of the world religions, that ideal that teaches tolerance and reciprocity. All of these basically tell us that
1. It is best to be kind to others.
2. You can expect kindness from the world.
3. Essentially, you reap what you sow. Your actions and thoughts do have value and affect others and the world around you.
There's a joy that comes from knowing that what you do matters. And that goodness can be followed by goodness.

10. Last, but certainly not least, my family

Big bunch of goofballs . . .

3 comments:

  1. Loved your list. Wow-you really have a way with words! Like always fun to read.

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  2. Thanks Susie. I was afraid perhaps this post was too long!

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  3. What a fabulous list, and what a lovely husband you have, I can't believe he wrote you a story to cheer you up, that is so lovely!

    ReplyDelete

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